Help and Information for Grieving Teens:
a youth helpline serving 21 counties in NJ. Youth can call a toll free number: 1-888-222-2228
and talk about such issues as: coping with the aftermath of divorce, living with a disability, dealing with grief, fears
about gang violence, concerns over bullying, issues related to sexuality, worries about family conflicts, questions about
drug and alcohol abuse, experiencing racism, problems in peer and dating relationships and more. There is a message
board as well to post questions: www.2NDFLOOR.org
Scarlet Listeners: free and confidential peer counseling and referral, Rutgers affiliated
(732-247-5555) Website: www.scarletlisteners.org
Society for the Prevention of Teen Suicide:
www.sptsnj.org Great site with lots of information about suicide prevention
for teens, parents and educators.
Girls and Boys Town National
National Suicide Hot-line
Your call will
be routed to the closest service to you.
The Compassionate Friends
TCF assists families
toward positive resolution of grief following the death of a child of any age and provides information to help others be supportive.
Internet Radio:Healing the Grieving Heart: an Internet radio show dedicated
to those who have lost loved ones. Broadcasts live every Thursday at noon. Shows are archived on www.opentohope.com
The Dougy Center: features the Bill of Rights for Grieving TeensHospice Net: helps teens with grief due to life threatening illnesses Net: helps teens with grief due to life threatening illnesses
SAVE (Suicide Awareness Voices of Education) support groups for survivors.www.save.org
What we call
is often the
And to make an end
is to make a beginning.
The end is where we start from.
When your broken heart mends, you will no longer be the same.
You will never be the same again. You will be stronger. June Cerza Kolf Teenagers Talk About Grief
Creating your own support network:
Some of our friends are great supports when we are upset or sad while others are able to handle our angry feelings.
Think of support as a network or system instead of just one or two other people in your life. Support networks can be made
up of people, places and things. Since grief affects our entire being it helps to find support for our physical, emotional and
social needs. Here are some questions that can let you know if you have a good enough support system or if you need to build
one or enlarge your network. Many teens turn to safe adults to help them grow their support network. Many teens tell
me these adults may be counselors at school, a parent (yours or someone else's) or even an older sibling or friend.
My Support Network:
1. List 3 people who I feel comfortable to
talk to: (I encourage all of you to find someone in the school building as well since you are there all day and often grief
hits while at school. There are counselors, school nurses, teachers, and others who you can talk to).
2. Name two places I can go to that helps me to feel comfortable and safe: (try to
locate a place in your own living space and one outside your living space).
three things that I can do to let my anger and frustration out and three people I can call or be with. (things that can not
hurt myself, others or property).
three things I can do to let my sad feelings out and three people I can call or be with:
5. Name three things I can do that helps
me let off steam or relieves my stress and tension:
3 things I can do when life feels meaningless- when I might feel hopeless and/or helpless:
7. List 3 activities I can do that will
help me to express your feelings: Some teens write, draw, hit pillows, nap, cry, sing, play music, play video games,
write songs, journal, play a sport, work, pound nails, volunteer with younger kids or older people, fish, cook, go to the
gym, go for a run, write letters, paint, do physical work, join a support group, call a hot line, .....
three things that are helpful in getting my mind off of my grief and loss: it is important to take grief breaks
some things that I did when you were younger that helped you through a difficult time or situation:
10. List the names of some songs I can play:
me feel good: _________________________________________________________________
To help me feel cared about and loved ____________________________________________________
me feel understood ______________________________________________________________
To help me with memories of my loss:________________________________________________________
(Adapted from the book: Facing Change:)
Helpful Books for Teens Facing Loss and Grief
When a Friend Dies, Teens Talk about Grieving and Healing
by Marilyn Gootman
The Grieving Teen: A Guide for Teenagers and
Their Friends by Helen Fitzgerald
You are Not Alone: Teens Talk about
Life after the Loss of a Parent: by Lynne Hughes (founder of Comfort Zone Camp, www.comfortzonecamp.org
) a wonderful support for kids 7-17 who have lost a parent, sibling or other important person through death. Lynne lost
both her parents by the time she was 14 years old. She is amazing and shows up at each CZC weekend, which now takes place
in 5 states, NJ included.
Grief Girl: True
story about a girl who lost both her parents when she was in high school. Great read for a teen who has lost a parent. Teens
have given this book the thumbs up for me to recommend it to others.
Grief Relief: by Dr., Horsely and Dr. Horesly (mother and daughter therapists
who had lost a son/brother when the daughter was in her early 20's)
Change: Falling Apart and Coming Together Again in the Teen Years: A book about Loss and Change for Teens by Donna O'Toole
Still Here With Me: Teenagers and Children
on Losing a Parent: Edited by Suzanne Sjoqvst Translated by Margaret
Letters to a Bullied Girl: Messages of Healing and Hope by