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Words to Try for Families:
( from Handbook for Mortals; Guidance for People Facing Serious Illness by Joanne Lynn, MD and Joan Harrold, M.D.)
When you think you want to say: Try this instead:
Dad, you are going to be fine. Dad, are there things
that worry you?
Don't talk like that! You can beat this! It must be hard to
come to terms
with all of this.
I just can't talk about this. I am feeling a bit
now. Can we talk
about this later?
Please don't give up. I need you here. I need you here. I will
miss you terribly. But
we will get through
Don't be glum. You will get well. It must be hard. Can I
just sit here with you
for a while?
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Listen, listen and then listen some more. There are some times that silence speaks louder than words. Often ill people appreciate more than anything, someone sitting next to him or her, quietly, patiently and compassionately. There is no need to fix or advise or judge. Just learn to sit and be. There is a great saying," don't just do something, sit there" that fits perfectly now.
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